Rescue Cat


It’s been a long time since I had a cat that I really enjoyed. My last cat decided that she no longer wanted to be admired, protected, provided for and cared for so she disappeared into the country town where I found her.

Well, I miss my cat but I can’t let the demise of our tumultuous relationship kill me.

So, if anyone knows where I can find a new and improved cat let me know. Write a letter to the editor, in box me on social media or send me a smoke signal from Lookout Mountain!

You know and I know for some reason God made that crazy cat the best cat. I loved to see that crazy cat attack her favorite snake. Any time and every time cat saw that long thick snake it wouldn’t be long before cat had that snake in her mouth! It gives me goose bumps just to write about it.

Anyway, my close friends are aware that I’m working my way back to my hometown of Atlanta, Georgia.

I’m a single man with no significant other so in a town with so many men that are attracted to men it should be easy for me to find a cat that wants a straight guy like me.

Perhaps, I should go straight to a place like Magic City, Strokers or rap star T.I.’s new strip club and try to get me a pole cat!

There are a lot of church mice in Atlanta and cats like mice so maybe I can find a good cat at church.

I hear cats like men with a lot of green cheese so why not look for a crazy cat at a bank?

The problem I’m having is my knowledge that some domestic cats aren’t loyal. If you want a cat that wants you and would be happy and proud to be your cat, your best bet may be to seek out that super good international cat!

That international cat can take a good man to school. I know some men that won’t even go near a domestic cat after they have spend a night or two with a Colombian cat or a Dominican cat.

Then again, beggars can’t be choosy. Any cat is a good cat when your last feline was a runaway cat, an alley cat or a hood cat that would run up against any man that only wanted a cat for the night.

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Bottom line is every cat wants to be fed. Cats like beef, chicken and Meow Mix but their delicacy diet is seafood. Why do you think some people feel a juicy cat smells like fish?

Yes, at this time in my life I want a rescue cat. I want to find me a cat that would be glad to play with me when its time, not all of the time. I like to hit that cat, so to speak, when that cat wants to get into it like a James Brown sex machine!

It might be difficult though because I, nor you, can rescue a cat that doesn’t want to be rescued just as you can’t save a man or woman that doesn’t want to be saved!

To write columns like The Gantt Report it takes energy, it takes courage, it takes imagination and it takes creativity.

Perhaps God will bless me again with a good, crazy cat that wants to rescue me! (Buy Gantt’s latest book, “Beast Too: Dead Man Writing” and from bookstores everywhere. Contact Lucius at And, if you want to,“Like” The Gantt Report page on Facebook.)