Hawk Attacks at Tampa Retirement Community

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Residents at Timber Pines retirement community have taken to leaving their homes with protective headgear on for fear of falling prey to vicious hawk attacks.

While it may sound like an excerpt from a Stephen King novel or the plot of an Alfred Hitchcock film, the tiny Florida retirement community in Hernando Valley has recently been under siege from an irate group of red-shouldered hawks.

The red-shouldered hawk is a territorial bird, with large talons that are perfect for seizing prey and defending their territory. Unfortunately, the hawks have claimed the retirement village as their territory, and the residents are now paying for it with bloodshed. Some residents have even been sent to the hospital for tetanus shots.

“Somebody is going get hit and die,” resident George Nott, 72, told the Tampa Bay Times. “I don’t want to go to a funeral because of a bird.”

A recent report revealed that 46% of Americans have less than $10,000 saved for retirement, and most likely have presumably fewer funds to spend on mending the wounds of a vicious hawk attack.

According to the New York Daily News, Hernando Valley is home to an abundance of wildlife and elderly individuals during the spring season. In the eyes of the red-shouldered hawk, who’s currently nesting, the senior invasion is likely seen as a threat, and the birds are currently seeking retaliation in order to protect their brood.

“If there’s nesting birds, you’re not supposed to mess with them,” spokesman Tom Mackenzie told the Daily News.

“We try and encourage people to wait it out and avoid the areas. I understand some guys are wearing a pith helmet, an elderly gentleman is wearing that. Some are wearing hats,” Mackenzie added.

The red-shouldered hawk is protected under the Migratory Bird Treaty, making it illegal to move the birds or their nests without obtaining the proper permits.