When a woman tells her spouse or committed man that she needs “a break”, it could mean a number of things.
The woman could be talking about a Girl Trip, a family visit, a business trip or perhaps just some “me time”.
Regardless of what men may think, it has little to do with bills, help with the kids, help in the kitchen or help around the yard. When the word break is used, it’s all and only about YOU!
Believe me, before “a break” is heard by you, the woman has discussed “a break” with her mama, her sister, her coworkers and her friends, oh yeah, and her new love interest!
You feel me? The decision to say break was made weeks, months or years ago.
I think, men and women that have different ideas, different needs and different desires should talk to each other about it.
Some women, when they are fed up, will leave a man at the drop of a hat. However, most women are patient when considering breaking with a man that loves his children and pays some or all of the bills.
Why do they leave? They get the courage to leave once they get mama approval, friend approval and coworker approval.
Superfly and The Mack are masters at another reason for break ups, “pimp talk”!
Pimp Talk is anything a man says when he’s chasing the Cat! Beware of men that will tell a married or committed woman, “I’ll sleep with you but I won’t marry you because you’ll go back to baby daddy”.
If you like a man that says that, you’re stuck. The pimp has taken control. Now, a woman has to do whatever the pimp talking man tells her to do while wishing that the pimp will marry and take care of her instead of taking care of “the stable”.
“I wouldn’t treat you like that”, “I love you more than he does” and I want you to marry me and have my baby” are all Pimp Talk lines when a man doesn’t know much about you, your family, your spirit or what touches your heart.
Don’t get it twisted, a woman or a man can grow apart or meet someone other than you that they absolutely fall in love with.
Just make sure the person you fall in love with loves you and also loves you more than your spouse and your side piece does!
Some people get married to obtain a green card. Others get married to honor vows, commitments and promises or to raise children a have a good family life.
Most men and women cheat at sometimes in marriages and relationships either in the streets or in their hearts and minds.
I may be wrong at times but, more often than not, when a woman tells me she wants “a break” and walks away from me, I tell her to keep walking and don’t come back!
But don’t do what I do, do what’s best for you.
I’m a journalist. Perhaps, I never would have heard a break word if I had been more expert at interpersonal communications, like I am now.
If there is a break in your future, figure out what you contributed to the situation like did.
Whoever suggests that they were perfect and blames relationship breaks all on the man or woman they left is the “breaker” or the person that I would investigate first!
Lucius is a contributing columnist to NNPA newspapers around the nation, and the author of “Beast Too: Dead Man Writing,” available on Amazon.com and from bookstores everywhere.